The Worst Thing I have Ever Done
Clare Stephens
I read this book on a whim, having read the blurb in a local book store I proceeded to obtain a copy, and ended up reading it cover to cover in basically one sitting. That said the fervant nature of my consumption of the book does not reflect great quality in my opinion.
TWTIHED (crazy long ass title) follows the story of a young editor in chief for a women's news outlet who is cancelled online; coincidentally it was written by the young ex-editor-in-chief of a women's news outlet which I'll come back to later. Following a well-intentioned news story of hers is torn apart by en ex-colleague, she faces the onslaught of online withc-hunting, bullying and cancellation. I do think this is executed well and the commentary provided by the author is important, how it seems that once someone is called out for something, it is free game to abuse them however one sees fit, and is infact perceived as virtuous. This along with the author's ability to drag the reader into the anxiety of the main character are the novel's strongest points. However, there are many more issues with the novel:
- The inciting event of the novel. The protagonist conducts an interview with a victim-survivor of domestic abuse, who was coerced into having an abortion she did not want. Once published, this is distorted by an online prolitical-influencer to represent pro-life, anti-feminist messaging for publishing this woman's story of regretting her abortion. Whilst one can easily imagine this situation happening in reality, it is incredibly hard to believe that no one (and in this novel no one is shown to) would argue that this diminishes the lived experience of the victim-survivor, and invalidates every other woman who had a similar experience.
- The Self Insert. As mentioned above, Clare Stephens was perviously the editor-in-chief to a women's magazine and website. The parallels between herself and the main character would be fine taken alone, but some moments within the novel make it feel like a fan-fiction self-insert; continuously describing how handsome, athletic and musclular Ruby's husband is, Ruby stating herself how uniquely skilled she is at making viral stories she is. there are also plenty of self-deprecating moments from the protagonist, however this did little to remedy how irksome I found the moments of self-agrandising and fantasy.
- The Final Section. The final third of the book changes perspective to the antagonist of the book, Felicity. Felicity posted the inital video cancelling Ruby, and throughout the book I'd been asking WHY she had such a callous hatred for someone she breifly worked with. The answer is given through a whiplash enducing change of perspective, that details Felicity's own sad story of teenage bullying, a sick mother and career disappointment. Ruby represents everything she hates about journalism, and seeing Ruby's success as her own life fell apart drove Felicity to post her call out. This whol section felt rushed to me, I can see the attempt to humanise Felicity and show how trauma perpetuates itself, but it felt tacked on, and the book could've ended on a stronger note.
Overall, I would recommend this novel, it was an easy read that I think did a pretty good job of carrying its message, and instilling a feeling of anxiety in the reader. However, falls quite short in a lot of other ways that make it feel a bit hollow and disappointing.
Rating: 2/5
tower dwellers